The Uncomfortable Art of Changing Our Mind*

As humans, we have this strange tendency: we cling to the familiar, even when we know it’s not serving us anymore. It’s like trying to keep an old phone running with tape and a prayer, while the evidence is shouting, “Just upgrade already!”

We do it in subtle ways, too. You know you want to start going to the gym or write that book, but somehow Netflix and scrolling through social media are just more appealing—not because you lack motivation, but because change is hard. In fact, we’re wired to resist it. Our brains find comfort in habits, even the ones that are counterproductive. And yet, if we’re honest with ourselves, deep down we know this resistance is often the only thing standing between where we are and where we want to be.

So why is it so difficult to change our approach when evidence, plain as day, suggests it’s time? It’s simple in theory: if what you’re doing isn’t working, try something else. But this logic feels murky when applied to the complexities of real life. It’s easy in math because 2 + 2 is always going to be 4. It’s not so straightforward with life’s more subjective pursuits—like becoming the person you actually want to be.

Think about the last time you tried to pick up a hobby or create a new habit. Maybe you promised yourself that this year you’d finally take up painting or hit the gym three times a week. But weeks later, the paintbrush is still unused, and the gym bag remains a stylish, but untouched, accessory in the back of your car. Why does this happen? It’s not because you’re incapable or unworthy. It’s because changing your routine—your very mindset—is one of the hardest things a person can do.

Here’s the kicker: what we often fail to realize is that these small changes—waking up early to go to the gym, or writing that page a day—aren’t just optional add-ons to life. They’re prerequisites for the bigger things we want. You can’t finish writing a book if you don’t start with a single word. You won’t get healthier without putting in the reps at the gym. And no, we don’t get to skip these steps, no matter how much we wish we could.

It’s about humility—being humble enough to admit when our current approach isn’t working and flexible enough to change course. Too often, people equate changing their mind with failure, when in reality, it’s a sign of wisdom. You’re not supposed to get everything right the first time (or the second). Success, in any form, is really just a collection of adjustments we’ve made along the way.

We all face this at some point. So here’s to embracing the discomfort of change, knowing that the path to becoming our best selves is paved with uncomfortable first steps—and probably a few abandoned New Year’s resolutions.

The next time you’re hesitating to start that hobby or implement that new habit, remember: the hardest part isn’t the doing. It’s the decision to change your mind.

*Coming from someone who is currently trying to maintain the habit of finishing a few swim laps every morning before 7 am.

Read more